Why We Accept the Love We Think We Deserve

Finding a balanced and healthy relationship can be tough. When you doubt yourself or believe you don’t deserve love, it can make the pain even worse. Valenti Matchmaking is here to help. First, you need to accept yourself and believe that you deserve a loving relationship. This article offers a professional perspective on self-acceptance and finding true love.

Why Do We Accept Love That We Think We Deserve?

This is a common topic in therapy—why do we settle for less love than we deserve? And where does the belief that we’re not worthy of better love come from? I often discuss this with my patients. I tell them that the type of love we attract reflects how we feel about ourselves. By improving our self-esteem and self-concept, we can attract better love. Let’s explore why this happens and how to break the cycle.

Terry Gaspard, a blogger at The Huffington Post, highlights five key patterns that indicate we’re accepting less love than we deserve. It’s crucial to break these patterns to receive the love we truly deserve. The current negative patterns include:

  1. Feeling depressed, with a partner who doesn’t support or motivate you.
  2. Feeling the need to change your values, goals, or dreams to please your partner.
  3. Being in an abusive relationship—emotionally or physically—and hiding it from others due to shame or codependency.
  4. Continuously giving chances to a partner who repeatedly hurts or betrays you.
  5. Sacrificing too much of yourself to meet your partner’s needs or expectations.

What are your thoughts on this topic? Feel free to share your questions or comments on our Ask Irene Page! Irene Valenti, our company’s founder, will personally respond to your queries!

This post was written by a professional at Valenti Matchmaking. Valenti Matchmaking offers discreet personal billionaire matchmaker services as well as all levels of personal, one to one relationship coaching for a select, worldwide clientele of unapologetically selective single, successful and attractive men and women in search of a compatible life partner.